Feeling like you belong?

imagesga1rwb5oMe again the non-writer that just types. (I’m horrible with English writing) I really want to give a shout out to you ladies for inviting me to be a part of the Women Veterans Group. I have felt so disconnected since I left the Army. Yesterday I met with a small group of other women veterans and for the first time in a long time I felt like I belonged to something bigger than myself again.
You see… I moved back to the Corpus area because I had family and friends here. Shortly (4 months) after moving back my father was promoted by his employer to a Sr. Vice President position (awesomeness for him) and my parents moved to Houston. Yeah I know that isn’t far but for me it feels really far. My mother has a rare blood cancer and we have always been close. She was more excited about me and my family moving to Corpus than I was. That all changed in a blink of an eye. We talk everyday now!!! Then I get back after being gone 7 years and also all of my so called friends are still doing the same thing, in the same place and didn’t grow as people in our society. I use to come home on leave and it was always nice to see everyone but looking back… What did we do??? We partied like rock stars. I guess looking back I didn’t notice it as much because I was home to visit and have a good time. Don’t get me wrong I enjoy going out as much as the next person but I’m not one to party like a rock star everynight. Now I have felt hurt, lost, confused, angry, sad, and mad. My plans didn’t work the way I wanted them to. What do I do now? Which way do I turn? How am I going to get out of this depression lonely stump of life? I’m a social butterfly and I always have been; but lately I have felt like my wings have been clipped. I can’t get anywhere. I know this is common with many Veterans and I’m just now after 2 years trying to figure this out. I mean I joined the Army to have a better life for myself and my children. I was a single mom and oh man was that a hard adjustment for me and my children. Even coming back and finding out that my family had to move and my friends (most of them) are not really my friends… I’m ok! I will adjust!! The people I thought had my back here in Corpus don’t have my back and most of them can’t even take care of themselves. Where does that leave me in their lives? Well it leaves me nowhere unless I want to change me and well I like the woman I have become. I like being able to pay my bills and have money left over for me or my family to do extra activities, but something is still missing.
You ladies have shown me that there is more to being a Veteran Woman than just a girl that served. That I can achieve my dreams after the Army and that no one can stop me but ME. I’m not the greatest at keeping up with things I should unless they are something that I know must be done. I procrastinate sometimes but I always manage to get the job done. So THANK YOU for showing me kindness and warmth. THANK YOU for just listening and letting me be a part of this fabulous group of women. THANK YOU for showing me that I can have a group of really awesome ladies that understand the same feelings and crazy emotions I get from time to time. I hope to get more involved in the months to come. Thanks for letting me vent today. Hope everyone has a wonderful week!

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One comment

  1. That’s exactly how I felt about my friends! We were so close before I left. I never imagined that would change, but now they are just Facebook friends. I’m like a novelty, not permanent in their lives.

    Like

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